Sunday, October 5, 2008

Other side of the coin

According to Gretchen Rubin “what we do every day matters more than what we do once in a while.”

Until today I’ve read this as meaning that we should work on our happiness by doing happiness-producing things every day. This is true, but there is another truth in there: If we do a thing once in while that is not conducive to happiness, it does not matter much and there is little to worry about.

Other side of the coin

According to Gretchen Rubin “what we do every day matters more than what we do once in a while.”

Until today I’ve read this as meaning that we should work on our happiness by doing happiness-producing things every day. This is true, but there is another truth in there: If we do a thing once in while that is not conducive to happiness, it does not matter much and there is little to worry about.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Just having a look.

I have a very useful phrase for starting a job that I’m procrastinating on. I’m not sure if I should make it a commandment or not. Here it is: “Just have a look.”

Making progress on a big job does not just depend on work, it also takes some planning and thinking. “Just have a look” might give new ideas or sharpen the questions.

“Just have a look” means the covers are off, the book is open, the file is loaded. If it really is too much work for now, then it will be clear. Often there is something small that can be done that will add to the progress. Sometimes the job just starts flowing. Just by having a look.

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Happiness and 43 Things

I’ve been wondering about the relationship between my 43 Things postings and my happiness project. A post by Gretchen Rubin on the original Happiness Project makes it clearer, I think. She writes about the difference between resolutions and goals. You achieve a goal. You keep a resolution. So 43 Things is a good place for plotting the progress towards goals, while something else would be good for keeping track of resolutions.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

To-do list entries.

In a flash of insight today, I saw why it is important to make goals as well-defined as possible. I had a mixed bag of things on my to-do list. One of them was as simple as “trim membership card” (so it would fit in my wallet) and the other was “do paperwork”. When I went to tick off the things on my list, I noticed that the things I’ve done made me glow with accomplishment, while the “paperwork” made my spirits sag momentarily. I’ve done some paperwork, but have I done enough? Have I forgotten something? A tiny dent appeared in my shining happiness.

So it appears that for my happiness, I should try to make the items on my to-do lists as sharply-defined as possible.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Notes from "What to do until the psychiatrist comes", a talk given by dr Murray Banks

The four things people want:
1. I want to live.
2. I want a feeling of importance.
3. I want someone to love me.
4. I want a little variety.

Free mental health checkup:
1. Are you happy? (Thermometer of mental health)
2. Do you have zest for living?
3. Are you socially adjusted? (First symptom of mental illness)
4. Do you have unity and balance?
5. Can you live with each problem in your life as it arises?
6. Do you have insight into your own conduct?
7. Do you have a confidential relationship with some other person?
8. Do you have a sense of the ridiculous? (Laughter)
9. Are you engaged in satisfying work?
10. Do you know how to worry effectively?

Happiness is just like chasing a butterfly. The more you chase it and chase it and chase it directly, then it will always just elude you. But if you sit down quietly, turn your thoughts to other things, then the butterlfy will come, and softly sit on your shoulder.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Ink on paper/Bytes on a disk.

If it's not written down, it never happened.
If it's not written down, it will never happen.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

Why I should try to be happy.

The last chapter of Undoing Perpetual Stress contains a summary of what needs to be done:

How to Rewire the Brain (In twelve easy steps.)

1. Get good at mindfullness.
2. Use mindfullness to develop a deeper awareness of your feelings.
3. Use mindfullness to recognize the biases and limits of your assumptive world.
4. Build will-power, self-control, and self-respect.
5. Control the effects of stress.
6. Be skillful about your body
7. Learn to appreciate your symptoms.
8. Think with your whole mind.
9. Construct and reinforce your support system.
10. Learn intimacy skills.
11. Learn how to be happy.
12. Practice, practice, practice.